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Mike Randle


“Blair Twitch Project”
March 13, 2003

Well, now it seems that, after adjusting his parachute a tad bit, Mr. Blair seems ready to leap from the burning plane of British Iraq-war public-opinion and try to save what’s left of his doomed political career. Not content to “fall on the knife” for his Yankee buddy, DUBYA, anymore, Blair has his House of Commons cronies working round the clock to come up with any type of resolution, REGARDLESS HOW RIDICULOUS, to try to appease British public opinion and his boys over in Washing D.C. But at least Blair can take solace in that it’s nearly over and he’ll be off the hook, although he’ll be singing lines from THE FALL GUY for years to come. Maybe Lee Majors could give him a tip or two on being a fall guy…

Personally, I feel bad for Blair cause he’s the fall guy in all this. And, knowing my wonderful USA government, it’s been a practical joke to even make Britain think we need them. The Brits would only get in way and besides, they are simply there to beef up the “Coalition of the Willing” slogan. Now, this whole war thing is stretching out and hitting close to home. It’s already wringing the US economy out, which may even doom the summer LOVE tour here in the states. Everybody’s hurting and there’s no end in site. My feeling is, if England is so disposable and not needed, why didn’t Blair just sit this one out? Surely, anyone who is against this invasion would agree that, without Britain’s initial support, the USA would have never even been capable of getting this far without showing too obviously by the way how looney and desperate Bush is for Saddam.

So, Blair, my man, you got played for a complete full. Used and abused, fella. Now, after all the B.S. you’ve been selling the BBC, you come out and announce “Britain may not join America” against Iraq but would still “support” us in spirit. Gee, merci beau-coup! Now, at least our government doesn’t even bother to cover sh*t up; you can see it right for yourself. The USA government knows that the average American could care less about ANYTHING that goes on outside of north America and over 60% of High school students here can’t even tell you where Vancouver is. We have all the reality shows we need, all the MTV we can handle and all the BIG MACS imaginable. Don’t bother us with this war thing. Just kick some ass, come home safe, get these gas prices back down and keep scaring the crap out of us while you chase down terrorist. it’s enough to make you long for the good old days, when all you had to worry about was the President getting a hummer. Let’s just hope Blair hasn’t gone THAT far in appeasing the Bush Dyslexicon of War…

Mike Randle


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